Monday, October 12, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
God, Please grant me patience and understanding.
to accept the things
I cannot change,
Courage to change the
things I can,
and the Wisdom
to know the difference.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Weekend photo shoots.. Sunflowers and Seniors
Sunday, August 2, 2009
I need a tree
While I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. On arriving, he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked toward the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands.
When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation. His face was wreathed in smiles and he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.
Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.
'Oh, that's my trouble tree,' he replied 'I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, those troubles don't belong in the house with my wife and the children.. So I just hang them up on the tree every night when I come home and ask God to take care of them. Then in the morning I pick them up again.' 'Funny thing is,' he smiled,' when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there aren't nearly as many as I remember hanging up the night before'."
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Forgiveness
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. ~Mahatma Gandhi
All my life I have struggled with forgiving. People that I should have forgiven years ago have passed, and I wish with all my heart I would have been able to tell them I forgave them. I struggle every day to realize that no one is perfect and people make mistakes. So this I vow to say every morning, this is my prayer.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr
Monday, June 15, 2009
photographer?

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The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a |
Sunday, May 24, 2009
The most beautiful surprise...
So, in the middle of all my busyness, I get the most wonderful surprise... My biological Dad, Jeff calls. Says him and his wife are in town and would like to see me! How exciting it was. I can't explain in words the anxiety that I felt as the moment neared. My hands were shaking, my heart beating a little faster. I'm not sure what I was thinking.. at first, that all was ok.. second.. hmm. I don't even know. When I saw him and Becky walking up, I know my whole body tensed up.. But, when I walked out that door and he was there with open arms.. it was like I was this little girl running into the arms of her Daddy. Of course I cried.
The hug. Oh, the hug. It was like the long awaited hug and I didn't want to let go. Anyone that knows me, knows that I struggle with hugs. I hug my husband and boys more than I can count on my fingers and toes everyday.. but friends, strangers, other family? I just struggle. My friend Tonya once told me that she could tell that I was very uncomfortable with the first hug we shared. I'm getting better- thank you Tonya :).. but back on the "daddy" hug. I will always remember that moment. It was the tightest hug, I felt like he didn't want to let go. Like all of those years that have passed.. all of those hugs missed.. ah. The hug. Again, when they parted, we hugged again. I felt as if, all the years missed, all the blame I've laid upon him, all the anxieties... gone in an instant. In a hug. Don't get me wrong, I'm trying to keep the "amy" guard up, but it almost seems impossible with him. As if my heart knows he's a good person. That it knows that he won't hurt me. I've prayed for years that we would once again find each other. It's now happened and I continue to pray that my heart will not again be broken.
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Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Kids.. they make my heart smile
watch a Little League base ball game that was being played in a
park near my home. As I sat down behind the bench on the first-
base line, I asked one of the boys what the score was
'We're behind 14 to nothing,' he answered
With a smile.
'Really,' I said. 'I have to say you
don't look very discouraged.'
'Discouraged?', the boy asked with a
Puzzled look on his face...
'Why should we be discouraged? We haven't
Been up to bat yet.'
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Oh, they grow so fast...
You have a lifetime to work, but children are only young once. ~Polish ProverbIt seems like just yesterday he was born. He gets so embarrassed when I talk about him being my baby. He's such a big boy now. Looking at this photo, I remember when the Easter bunny brought that bike to him 2 years ago.. with training wheels.. and look at him go. Now time for a new bike, next thing ya know, we will be in highschool, then graduating, then college... boohoo.
I am blessed.
You don't really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around - and why his parents will always wave back. ~William D. Tammeus
It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself. ~Joyce Maynard
If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
~Diane Loomans, from "If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again"
Sunday, May 3, 2009
21
TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.
FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.
SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.
EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.
NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.
ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.
TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.
THIRTEEN! .. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'
FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.
SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.
EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Deep breath... ahhhh
When I am in a photo shoot, before I start.. deeeep breath... ahhhh. Now I am ready to shoot! I feel that I am a very good people reader and can tell when a model is feeling a little uncomfortable with the photo shoot. Usually at the beginning... so I say, take a deep breath, wiggle the shoulders and loooosen up!!! After that we get awesome shots!!
So as I write this, I am trying very hard for that deep breath tonite but for a reason unknown, I feel as if I am suffocating. I just can't take that deep breath I talk so much about. I can't quite explain it any better than that. Maybe I am in need of a personal vacation? I love my family. My husband and two boys.. more than anything in this world. As big as the sun and the moon and the sky is what Zane says. But somedays, it's just all too much. Maybe I expect too much from myself? I'm sure that's it. I bring all this on myself. To be the perfect wife and mother. To be the best I can be at my job. To please everyone, everyday I can. To have perfect children... one's that actually listen. To be the very best possible friend to the wonderful people I have in my life. To have the cleanest house. To do this, to do that. I expect a lot from myself and feel as if I fail everyday.
I once wrote this quote.. there is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one. Words to live by, but I just can't seem to take my own advice. Is it being a woman that makes me this way? My husband does not feel this way. He expects much of himself but the way he handles it amazes me. I admire the way he deals with things.. well, most of the time :) Me, the hormonal woman, just cries, or shuts down with the irritation scale on high.
I need to stop... to take a deep breath.... Ahhh... deep breath.. ahhhh.. deep breath...
I feel a little better, but still have so much on my mind tonite..





